Vil han eller ej??

Hej,
jer er en pige på 29 som for tiden går rundt med en masse tanker i hovedet, som jeg ikke rigtig kan få svar på...
Jeg prøvede en af de her datingsider, og kom i snak med en rigtig sød fyr. Vi skrev sammen hver dag på sms, msn/cam et langt stykke tid, og blev mere og mere glade for hinanden, faktisk en smule forelskede... Vi ville gerne mødes, selvom vi bor i hver vores ende af landet. ´
Da vi mødtes faldt vi hurtigt i snak,og alt gik rigtig godt, og vi brugte en weekend i hinandens selskab. Vi faldt begge for hinanden.
Da han så er kommet hjem til sig selv, fortsætter vi med at skrive/ringe hver dag, og vi ved begge vi vil ses igen. Dette går så fint så fint i 2 ugers tid, og så sker der noget...
Men hvad ved jeg ikke?? Vi bliver enige om at slette vores datingprofiler, da vi begge vil hinanden. Jeg sletter min, men han sletter ikke sin.. Han holder op med at ringe, svarer dårligt på mine sms'er, men når han endelig gør siger han, at han rigtig gerne vil mig, og jeg for ham er hans drømmepige.
Nu har det stået på i snart 3 uger, hvor han ikke avrer når jeg ringer, og kun svarer på min sms en gang i mellem, og med meget korte svar. Jeg skrev til ham, at jeg ikke rigtig kunne finde ud af ham, fordi han siger han vil mig, men det kan jeg ikke få til at hænge sammen, da vi jo dårligt har nogen kontakt mere.
Hvordan skal jeg tolke det her??
Lucia.

Konen har taget ham til nåde og han har flyttet slæberne ind igen, men er på den anden side ikke interesseret i at lukke en dør til dig.
Men men - velmenende råd er vel også noget værd. Kender du ham her og hans "program"?
*************************************************************************************

What To Do When He's Pulling Away

Did you know there are CRITICAL moments that
will either break you and your man apart... or
keep your relationship going strong?
And that how you HANDLE those critical moments
means everything to the future of your love life?
What if you had a road map that pinpointed
each of those moments in a relationship and
showed you how to steer them in such a way, that
a man will only want to get closer and closer to
you?
I've identified 15 make or break moments that
come up in almost every relationship and created
a program that will teach you EXACTLY what to do
and say in each of these crucial moments right
here:
http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/MakeorBreak

Now let me turn to an important issue.
Every day I get tons of emails from women
asking me what it means when a man they were
dating or in a relationship with pulls away from
them. And my response is almost always the same.
I tell them that pulling away is very common
for a man - even in the best of relationships.
What matters here is not that the man is pulling
away, it's how the woman HANDLES the situation
when he does.
Because while you can't generally control why
he pulls away, you CAN have full control over how
you respond to it.
Think about that for a minute. You have
enormous power in your relationship with a man to
steer things in a positive direction... even if
he's not "cooperating" with you in any given
moment.
So let me ask you this:
How do you usually respond when a man pulls
away? Do you get upset and react out of fear to
the problem he's creating?
Or... are you conscious and aware enough to
take a moment to make a different choice - a
choice that could reconnect you both right away
rather than push back when you feel him pulling
away?"
A large part of handling this situation with a
man actually involves not DOING very much at all.
If you've ever heard of the expression "action in
inaction", you'll want to keep it in mind here.
The concept is that NOT taking action and
giving up control of a situation is sometimes the
most powerful action you can take.
Why? Because you're allowing events to unfold
naturally and you actually get to learn
information you can use to then take the necessary
action.
Let me show you what I mean in the context of
this all-too-common relationship scenario where a
man pulls back.
NON-ACTION 1: TAKE A STEP BACK YOURSELF
When a man who has been showing a lot of
interest in you suddenly pulls back, your
immediate reaction is probably to launch into
"fix it" mode. You might start to worry, ask him
what he's thinking and feeling, and generally try
to "fix" the situation.
While this might seem like a sensible,
proactive thing to do, it usually ends up leaving
you frustrated and can actually create more
distance between the two of you.
That's because when one person in any
interaction becomes the "convincer", the other
person will usually resist. It's human nature,
and you probably know it all too well from your
experience with men.
A key to not falling into the trap of trying
to fix things when a man withdraws into himself
and to not drive yourself crazy trying to get him
out of it is to first understand if this is a
pattern HE HAS in his own life.
If so, the first you need to do is to get
clear that this is NOT about you. Doing that will
allow you to clear your mind and stop acting from
a place of worrying or wondering if it's something
about you or your relationship.
NON-ACTION 2: IDENTIFY HOW HE'S WITHDRAWING
Taking a step back also let's you do something
else: It gives you a chance to observe him and if
his withdrawing is more a pattern of his own
rather than a reaction to something specific in
your relationship.
There are two ways a man can withdraw. I call
them "annoying withdrawal" and "dysfunctional
withdrawal".
Annoying withdrawal is when a man pulls back
into himself and his own mind for a few minutes
or hours and takes space for himself.
Sure, he might shut down his feelings and
communication, but he doesn't do this for long.
He is also able to come out of it and ultimately
communicate and allow space for your feelings
once he's out of it.
On the other hand, dysfunctional withdrawal
does not allow for your feelings. It usually
lasts longer and is more isolating and intense.
It repeats frequently in response even to
seemingly little stresses or things a man isn't
capable of handling emotionally, and it does not
ultimately allow for the exchange and
communication that a real relationship requires.
THE RIGHT KIND OF ACTION THAT BRINGS HIM CLOSER
Once you get the first two steps I shared
above, there's a simple way to permanently avoid
the kind of withdrawal that makes you feel less
appreciated or understood by a man.
Here's something interesting about how men
work that you probably never thought of.
A man falls more DEEPLY in love with you
because of the way you handle the important
moments in your relationship - in ways other
women can't and don't.
My CD/DVD program Mastering Make or Break
Moments With Men tells you exactly the right
action - and non-action - to take during all of
the key moments that will come up in your
relationship with a man.
These are the moments that can either create
irreparable distance between you... or create an
unshakable bond that you can build on for a
loving, lasting relationship.
Moment #10 in my program is all about The
Emotionally Withdrawn Man.
In it, I show you the 5 Tools that get rid of
a man's "withdrawal response" in your
relationship - replacing it with a pattern of
more consistent and open communication that will
keep you both close and connected.
If you want to know exactly what's in it and
take a peak at what each one of the 15 Make or
Break Moments are with a man in your
relationship... keep reading...
MAKE HIM COME BACK STRONGER THAN EVER BEFORE
Wouldn't it be great if you didn't have to
wonder if or when your guy would withdraw again...
because you've set it up for him to address the
pattern for himself?
And imagine the security you'll feel once
you've put into place the tools that keep him
connected with you and emotionally engaged in
your relationship.
Isn't that when things are easiest and you
feel your best anyhow - when you can see and feel
that your man is truly excited and involved in
what you're feeling and what's going on in your
relationship?
Are you ready to finally experience that
feeling of confidence and comfort that comes with
that kind of rock-solid foundation?
Then it's time to make the conscious,
empowered choice to discover what exactly it is
that will make it easy for yourself and your man
to have the closest connection possible.
Go here and try Mastering Make or Break
Moments With Men:
http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/MakeorBreak

In this program, I also show you the exact
steps and tools for handling the other 14 critical
moments that have the power to make or break your
relationship.
I'll show you EXACTLY how to navigate things
like:
- Moment #3: Picking The Right Man For You - Here
you'll know how to easily tell if a man is worth
your time BEFORE you get involved with him
- Moment #7: Moving Into An Exclusive
Relationship - Here you'll learn how to ensure
EXCLUSIVITY before you sleep with a man
- Moment #9: He Says "He's Not Ready - This will
show you how to handle this situation, including
the best way to communicate your needs with a man
without SCARING him off
- Moment #15: You're Broken Up Or About To: How
To Get Him Back - This will show you how to break
the cycle of on-again, off-again with a man so
you finally get what you want
- And tons more
This program will not only teach you how to
handle these and all 15 key Moments in your
relationship with a man, but it will also show
you how to be the kind of woman a man will
cherish with all his heart and soul.
And I really want that woman to be you.
That's why I'll let you try my program 100%
risk free for 30 days. If you're not happy with
it, just send it back without paying a penny.
If you're ready to stay close and connected
with the man in your life, no matter what moments
you encounter, then go here for your free trial:
http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/MakeorBreak

And I'll talk to you again soon, and best of
luck in life and love.


Your Friend,
Christian Carter


P. S. Ever wondered if it's possible for a man to
be so attracted to you and caught up with thoughts
about you that he doesn't NEED to withdraw in the
way most guys do?
It's completely possible - if you know how to be
the woman who can attract a man at a deep,
emotional level.
My program Natural & Lasting Attraction is all
about showing you how to create such an intense
feeling of attraction in a man that he can't help
but have all his thoughts and attention on YOU.
It will literally show you how to sidestep a
man's natural withdrawal response and quickly
draw him back in. Read more about Natural &
Lasting Attraction and watch testimonials from
real women here:
http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/NALA

han har jo fået hvad han ville have,sex.
Du skal ikke regne med ham.Du skal tolke det på den måde,at du ikke er lige hans type.
Du skulle for ham lige prøvekøres,og tro mig,det var hvad han gik efter.
Glem ham,for han har glemt alt om dig.
Gå aldrig iseng med en mand på den første date,det vil bare stemple dig som billig og nem tøs.
Håber du lærer noget af det.

Han har aldrig været interesseret i et
fast forhold, men regnede med at komme
i seng med dig. Når fuglen er fanget i
guldburet, så indstiller han jagten.
Når han ikke har nedlagt sin profil, så
betyder det kort og godt. At han har
lagt dig på is, og søger efter et nyt
nemt offer.

jeg giver dig ret i dit indlæg.

Og længere er den ikke. Han nedlagde dig, hallede et hak i sin sengegavl og kom videre efter den næste.
Lige et spørgsmål. Du skriver du er 29 år, men omtaler dig selv som pige.
Hvorfor det, er det fordi du ikke vil ses som en voksen person. Det har altid undret mig at kvinder omtales og omtaler sig som piger.
Hvorfor det?

- jeg føler mig da godt nok priviligeret med den vennekreds og kærester jeg har haft gennem tiden. Jeg synes egentlig også, det lyder som om at mænd vil noget andet og mere end du tiltror dem.
- er du en afvist mand (der gerne ville være noget andet) eller er du en bortdømt?

- Nu undre jeg mig. 😮

Jeg er nok blevet lidt mere sort og hvid eller kynisk om man vil, med aldren. Med hensyn til mænner.
Hun skriver jo at de har mødtes, og at han derefter gik i sort over for hende. Så den kyniske side af mig tænker han har hakket i sengegavlen og kommet videre.
Eller også er han bare en kylling der ikke tør fortælle, at hun og ham ikke er det som han troede.
Men alt det er spekulationer. Men hvorfor skulle han så blive helt tavs?
Og jeg undre mig stadig over at en voksen kvinde på 29 omtaler sig selv som en pige.😉

Tak for jeres respons :)
Men jeg har ikke nævt at vi havde sex...!? Har slet ikke omtalt det, og allievel går de fleste ud fra, at det havde vi...? Så må jeg lige sige at det havde vi så ikke. Vi havde en dejlig weekend, men kys, nus og kram, men ingen sex.
Grith, jej omtaler normalt mig selv som en kvinde, så at jeg har fået skrevet pige er da fejl!!🙂Tror lige jeg havde for mange tanker og ord i hovedet da jeg skrev mit indlæg... Så må lige rette den 29-årige fra pige til kvinde!! 😉

Hold hovedt på plads. Så kan det ikk gå helt galt. 😉😉😉😉

Det kan oz være han bare ikke synes det skal være jer. Og at han ikke lige havde enten hjertet eller mandsmod til at sige det til dig.
Det sker. Jeg høre det fra enkelte at de har været på date med en. M som K. Og det gik godt. Men de høre ikke mere.
Ikk så tit heldigvis. Men ind i mellem.